Parental Advice From Heavily Recruited Player
Advice dispensed by club coaches and parents during recruiting process over multiple years. Also, things we simply learned/observed/experienced as a parent of a 2025 recruit.
For player context, daughter didn’t have a “dream school” and undecided in field of study plays for ECNL club, USYNT ID Camp participant, Ranked in National Top 100 by Prep Soccer.
June 15, 2023
- Initial communication mainly via text and emails to set up times to talk.
- The first text came in at midnight.
- On June 15/16 – did deep dive into the programs most interested in. Example: transfer rate/coaching tenure/RP|/Win-Loss record over past 3 years/freshmen minutes/roster size/roster geography/academic offerings/cost of tuition.
- Advised to make a top picks list and set up calls with those immediately. Kept organized list of calls. Knew some schools weren’t for her so kindly said she was grateful for the text or email and wished them the best with their recruiting.
- Each call lasted about 30 to 45 minutes (some Facetime some just normal calls).
Learned to space them out allow time to reflect/take notes after/decompress before next call. - Make notes of who you are talking to the most. Head Coach? Assistant Coach?
Sometimes that can let you know what tier you may fall into initially. If your player is talking mostly to an Assistant, ask to set up time to talk with the Head Coach as soon as possible. - Favorite question she asked: When was the last time was you saw me play and what did you like about my play/abilities and how does my style of play fit into your program?
Gave her a very good idea of who has been following her journey. Some had been watching her for 3 years leading up to June 15 and they talked about her growth from when they first saw her to the present day to where they see her in the future. - Some will talk visits right away; some will do a few calls before offering up a visit. Some talks spanned over a few weeks.
VISITS
- Narrowed list down to Top 7-8 schools. Planned for 7 of those visits first. Got a big desk top calendar and penciled in visits. Official visits are a lot mentally and physically. So much information packed into 2 days. It was information overload so I chose to take notes for my daughter so she could be fully engaged in the visit and conversations.
- Ask if the visit is solo or with a group (benefits to both)
- Ask what is covered and allowed on visits. Player costs only or player/parent costs covered?
- Visit once the season is going and school is in session. You get to see what a busy campus looks like. Sit near the bench to listen in on the communication and coaching Visits in Aug/Sept were tough as players miss either school or miss games.
- Who is taking you around campus? Head Coach? Assistant? Combo?
- Visits consist of/but not limited to: Talks with Academic Advisors, Sports Psych, Nutritionists, Physio, Strength and Conditioning coaches, attending a team practice and/or game, campus tour, NIL-Collective-Alston Aid talks, Pro pathway talks, time with players, breakfasts, lunches, dinners with coaches and or team. Maybe take in a football game if there is one during your visit.
- As the parents we assumed the role of asking financial questions regarding scholarship offers, financial aid, and if an offer has an expiration date.
- Don’t feel pressured to decide on the spot unless you KNOW that is your dream school or perfect fit. Ask for time to reflect, but also be respectful of their recruitment window and timeline too.
- Take at least 2 visits so you have something to compare. She had 7 she initially wanted to visit but ended up pairing it down to 5 after talking to coaches more about the financial aspect. In the end she went on 3 official visits as she had found her fit, so she cancelled her remaining 2 visits.
- Some schools showed interest early but the conversations stalled so we assumed they were busy courting players higher on their tier, or she wasn’t the right fit for them.
Some programs that had drifted away came back into the picture a little later in the process. If it was a school she was interested in, she added them back to her list for consideration. - Once she knew she wasn’t going to choose a school, she made the phone call. We chose a call over texts as programs were gracious enough to offer or grant a visit, the least she could do was talk to those same coaches via a call and thank them for their interest and time and share her appreciation for the offer. Those calls were the hardest for her as she really liked a lot about the schools she visited. It was also hard to listen to those calls as a parent as you could hear the disappointment on the other end of the phone.
However, most coaches were very kind, gracious and understanding and left the door open for her should anything ever change. - The best part – When she made the call to the coach at her school of choice. It’s one of the most fun moments you’ll ever get to witness. Our journey went from June 15 to mid to late August when it was all said and done.
June 15 is just a starting date. It’s not a sprint – take your time and trust the process.